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support385039
- 2 days ago
- 5 min read

SAVOR THE PlCKLE! (a.k.a. Britt is running amok and has taken over the NL!)

A (Long) Word from the Queen Helper Bee👑🐝

Hi everyone! While Rachel is dealing with literal lunatics and working on a top-secret new project I'm not allowed to breath a syllable about on pain of ☠️☠️☠️, I'm taking over her newsletter - which means I can write WHATEVER I WANT and possibly even get away with it too!

First item on the agenda: SALT LAKE CITY FANX! (And lots of behind the scenes tea 🫖)

What a wrap on my first summer of convention season with Rachel! 🥳

Having just arrived home from the amazing Salt Lake City FanX event I can now say with certainty... what a RUSH! Each event we attend really is so special and fun, but there is also SO MUCH work and planning that goes into each one. (I literally don't know how she did it on her own for so long.)

It's been wonderful getting to travel alongside Rachel and witness first-hand the level of care and effort she pours into her work and readers. Watching the way she engages with her readers, both new and familiar, is just something you cannot put into words. They laugh together (and sometimes straight up CACKLE), they cry together, they yell out completely inappropriate things randomly just for funsies ... She gave so many hugs and made multiple people cry, which then made ME cry! 😭

Like my awesome Inked-inspired siren hide leggings??

And through it all, Rachel and I have gotten to know each other a little bit more each time. Really, we keep learning that we're just more and more alike than we thought and you know how each person has their own little quirks and silly things? ... Yeah we have A LOT of those in common. 🤪

Rachel and I "savoring the pickle" at one of our rest stops on the way to SLC. Turns out, pickle juice is super hydrating for roadtrips!

Except... I haven't bitten a stranger in public, then tried to apologize but only spit out incomprehensible gibberish and then sprinted away at an impressive speed when realizing the "stranger" wasn't who I thought it was. THAT was definitely just a Rachel thing. (She's gonna unalive me for sharing that with all of you but still totally worth it!!)

A few more highlights/revelations from SLC while I can still get away with it:

We're both big fat cry babies for epic instrumental music. Rachel's a BIG fan of Samuel Kim and his epic Star Wars compositions. You should check them out!!

"AAH! This is definitely not tofu!" Rachel took me to my first experience with Shabu Shabu, a Japanese style of eating where you cook the food at your own table. Thinking she'd grabbed some firm tofu in her bowl, Rachel plopped an entire cube in her mouth and then turned white as a napkin when she realized it was actually a fishcake. Turns out, Rachel hasn't gotten over her previous experience with Japanese fish 🤣
I've also decided that I need to drive Rachel around for hours on end WAY more often, because remember that TOP SECRET PROJECT I mentioned above that she's gonna kill me for mentioning? She had SO many epiphanies and awesome ideas about it that I am bursting at the seams to tell you!!! Any guesses as to what it might be?😈 (I can neither confirm nor deny but I'd love to hear your thoughts!)

Lastly, she managed to convince author David Andrew Trotter to climb up onto a vent in the middle of SLC....in a kilt. It. Was. GLORIOUS.

Anyway 🤣 - let's move on to some other really exciting stuff. We are so excited to be starting a new reader group on Facebook: RACHEL'S RENERGADES! This is going to be a place where you can come for the tea and stay for the snark. There will be a bigger/more official announcement later, but you guys are the very first to hear it and have the chance to join early! We'll have opportunities to join together and buddy read some of Rachel's books in a book-club style, chat about books and upcoming events, and mayyyybee even get insider access to new release teasers before they go live. (Read: you will DEFINITELY be the first to hear about Rachel's most exciting projects way before anyone else.) Oh, and Rachel has said she's gonna routinely give out the most outlandish signed prizes to the most engaged members. I'm pretty sure she mentioned she's gonna send someone a signed rubber banana at some point?!?!?! 🍌

Our first buddy read is planned to start on Wednesday, October 9th and seeing as it's spooky season we'll be starting with none other than The Bone Whisperer Chronicles*. Whether you've read this amazing duology before or have been eyeing it on your TBR, you are welcome to join us. Want more deets and info? Join the group here!

*Even though Rachel never discounts special edition books (unless they're damaged), she's given me permission to offer 15% off discount codes to all Renergades. All you have to do is join the group and we'll get you all the info you need!

For those of you who have been asking, we've restocked those gorgeous Gilded Blood calendars for 2025, so go nab yours now!!

Lastly, please help me wish Rachel a HUGE congratulations for Inked winning not one but FIVE categories in the Indie Ink Awards:

- Best book cover and cover artist

- Side Character MVP

- Best use of tropes

- Prettiest book interior, and

- Best light read

That brings her up to 3 first place awards for the year!!! 😱

With that, I shall bid you all a wonderful week ahead. Remember, if you ever need me you can reach me at support@rachelrener.com. Can't wait to talk soon and hopefully see you in the new reader group!

XoXoX,

Britt 🫶🏼

If you're reading this on Goodreads or on Rachel's blog, be sure to sign up for my newsletter to get the most exciting updates sent directly to your inbox!

EXCITING FREEBIE!!!

From Rachel:

My friend Lisa McBride has an awesome freebie that I wanted to share with you! Boneyard Thief is the prequel to the Riley Cruz series. If you like fun, fast-paced urban fantasy with quirky characters (which I know you do!), this is the book for you.

BLURB:

Sixteen was supposed to be about fast cars and first kisses, not plotting a heist that might get me killed.

As a scrawny goat shifter in a pack of werewolves, my role is to get into places they can’t go. The alpha who took me in after my parents died molded me into a master thief. For four long years, he’s lined his pockets, while I’ve taken all the risks.

Now he’s sending me after the magical artifact he’s chased for years. This is my chance to escape. All I have to do is pull off the biggest heist I’ve ever attempted, escape the seethe of vampires I’m about to rob, and ditch the wolves who watch my every move.

To walk away from this job alive, I better prove I’m as good at getting out of trouble as I am at wading into it.

Read now for FREE!

Rachel
- Sep 17
- 2 min read

It's official: Stephen King and I are pretty much besties. (And I've done the math to prove it.)

That's right, you heard me. The Magazine of Fantasy & Science Fiction just published an unprompted review* of INKED in their column, Books to Look For. Now, this magazine has been around for millions and billions of years, having been founded alllll the way back in 1949. They were also the original publisher of Stephen King's Dark Tower, which helped skyrocket him to his current pillar of greatness.

How does this make the two of you besties? You might be wondering.

Thank you so much for asking; I will tell you.

Be forewarned, this is where the math gets a little tricky, but I'll do my best to lay it out step by step:

If you take 75 - the number of years The Magazine of Fantasy & Science Fiction has been around for, multiplied by the 5 Dark Tower stories that were originally published in The Magazine of Fantasy and Science Fiction, then divide by 76 (Stephen King's age as of today), then take the square root of that product and subtract 5.1112781 (for reasons that go without saying), and then raise it to the power of 8 (the number of books in the completed Dark Tower series, you get 8,357,135.

Which, when written digitally, spells out:

Or, "BESTIES".

As you can clearly see, the math is ironclad and incontrovertible and DEFINTELY doesn't need any checking by, you know, actual mathematicians:

___________

((√((2024-1949) x 5) ÷ 76)-5.1112781)^8 = 8,357,135

(And yes, I definitely wrote out that equation perfectly, so don't you dare @ me on #MathTok and embarrass yourself!)

So there you have it; Stephen King and I, having both been mentioned in the same magazine, are officially besties. I'll let you all know when our upcoming collaborative novel will be released!!🤩 (Hopefully it won't be too scary since I'm kind of a baby but I'm sure he'd be okay with taking the back seat on the plot and swapping out psychopathic clowns for hunky incubi.)

*Fantasy and Science Fiction Review:

Apparently it will be published in the Summer 2024 issue, which I shall be laminating and framing and - if the mortuary allows for it - taking to my grave!

Oh and PS, the proof for the Revamped Lightning Conjurer Complete Series Omnibus just arrived and it is sexy AF! 🤩

(Here's the link to the video just in case it doesn't load properly!)

Isn't it gorgeous? I just know my new best friend Stephen King would be so proud of how it turned out🥲

GIVEAWAY ALERT!

Here's how to enter: After perusing the big book sale the participating authors are hosting, you can finalize your entry here. The winner gets a crazy number of prizes, including a $20 Amazon Gift Card plus 16 urban fantasy books and swag:

(Yep, that lovely pink book is mine and the first (and possibly last) time I'm offering it in a giveaway!)

Thanks for being here and have a great Tuesday!!

*If you're reading this on Goodreads or on my blog, be sure to sign up for my newsletter to get the most exciting updates sent directly to your inbox!

support385039
- Sep 13
- 6 min read

Monster BLEEPS, Haggis, & also my PA might need an exorcἱsm?! 😭

DISCLAIMER: I am not responsible for any balderdash, gobbledygook, or idiotic mumbo-jumbo you may find in this newsletter since I just got back from Scotland late last night. Also, there may be typos. Sue me.

Happy Monday! (Or Tuesday, if jetlag smacks me in the face and I don't get this sent 'til tomorrow 😂) Now, before we get distracted by monster 🍆's and exorcisms, make sure you scroll to the bottom of this email for a super cool urban fantasy giveaway that includes a bunch of signed books, including a certain pink beauty!

Okay, now where was I? Oh, right - Scotland!

Britt, Aaron, and I got there a few days before the convention (and immediately after Dragon Con, in my case) to explore Edinburgh, but I seriously regret doing that. You see, we ended up venturing into these dark, spooky underground tunnels that housed hundreds - if not thousands - of people over the centuries in what were pretty appalling conditions. Apparently, the spiritual activity down there is so high, a coven of witches took up residence there a few decades ago to harness that supernatural energy into channeling their spells. This is the altar where they practiced, which has been preserved behind locked bars:

In general, the ghosts and witches got along - except for in one room. That room housed a spirit so malignant, the witches had to create a circle of stones to trap it inside.

So what does Britt do?

Yup, you guessed it.

After she ignored my pleas to stay out of the summoning circle, I reminded her that demonic possession is NOT a valid reason for paid time off. She apparently didn't like that, because her head started spinning around as radioactive green goo spewed violently from her mouth.

(In other words, a typical Tuesday 😂)

Anyway, even though Britt was kind of agitated and exclusively speaking ancient Greek from that moment forward, we had a great time exploring some of the gorgeous sites of Edinburgh. We actually saw some of Scotland's elusive blue skies, too!

And then came RARE!

I was so incredibly excited and honored to sit next to my new "Bookstie" and emotional support author, Annette Marie (who also happens to be my favorite UF author of all time)! Her team and mine had so much fun together! Our PAs are now besties, as are our husbands 😂

On the other side of my table was Opal Reyne, a positively delightful Aussie who has a penchant for monster smut. And I don't mean shifter romance, where the raunchy stuff takes place while the werewolf / leopard / silverback gorilla is in his hunky and muscular human form, but, like, MONSTER smut:

And because she's a brilliant marketer, Opal has had all sorts of custom x-rated artwork commissioned for her series. But she didn't just stop at two-dimensional art. She ventured ALL the way into - ahem - "artistically explicit three dimensional sculptures."

(If you don't want to see HIGHLY detailed monster d*ldos, you should definitely scroll past this next part.)

Apparently the tentacles wrap around the head like alien face huggers, so that's fun!🐙 At one point I ran over to Annette's table waving a massive jiggling d*lgo and shouting, "Look, Annete! Giant monster c*cks!" To which she paled slightly and said something along the lines of, "That's a big ol' nope from me, thanks!" (Only to wander over to Opal's table a few minutes later🤣)

I haven't read much (read: any) true monster smut. Have any of you read Opal's work, or any other books like hers? If so, what did you think?

Speaking of purple tentacled monster appendages, I have GOT to remember that people actually read these newsletters. Do you know how many gals came up to me and asked me about stuffing fish in my knickers or hoisting myself into filing cabinets? (I'll take "An uncomfortably high number of people" for $500, Alex!🥲)

But that's one of the many joys of RARE; everyone there is a little bit unhinged in all the best ways. For example, I had folks asking me to sign various parts of their bodies, gifting me crocheted d*cks and g-string bookmarks, and telling me to write "whatever" I wanted in their autograph books. Which I of course obliged:

And before you all yell at me for defacing their belongings, here are a few of the presents I was given:

I was just driving the same speed limit as the rest of the speeding traffic, Officer!🤣

For those of you who are still here and haven't immediately unsubscribed, we have a number of fun goodies that just arrived and/or restocked in my shop!

My favorite is probably the Topie hoodie, which is so lightweight and incredibly soft!! You can get a closer look of some of the new items in this video I made that TikTok only showed to 6 people. (WTF, Tok?! It's not like I was talking about monster d*cks! (Er......this time.))

SURPRISE GIVEAWAY: The first person to reply to this with a piggy emoji (🐷) gets a full set of 5 Topie pins for FREE in thanks for actually reading the newsletter!!

As a reminder, we are getting a new shipment of holographic rainbow Gilded Blood omnibuses, Bone Whisperer Special Edition Duologies, and a brand-new revamped Lightning Conjurer Deluxe Omnibus in early November.

What we are NOT getting is another shipment of gold Gilded Blood omnibuses. Much like gold blood, I'd like to keep the gilded version of the special edition special and rare. So if you've been eyeing those golden, glittering sprayed edges, the time to buy is now!

(Don't mind the mess on the floor. This summer as been pure, unbridled chaos.)

And now for that giveaway I was telling you about! Basically, you follow all the authors listed here on Instagram. (And while you're on the page, you can peruse the big book sale all of us are hosting!)

After that, you go finalize your entry here.

The winner gets a crazy number of prizes, including a $20 Amazon Gift Card plus 16 urban fantasy books and swag:

(Yep, that lovely pink book is mine and the first (and possibly last) time I'm offering it in a giveaway!)

Okay, my brain is grumbling for sleep and my stomach is grumbling for food, even though it's 3 pm and I shouldn't be needing either of those things.

Have a wonderful week ahead, be well, and happy reading!❤️

If you're reading this on Goodreads or on my blog, be sure to sign up for my newsletter to get the most exciting updates sent directly to your inbox!

A Word from our Queen Helper Bee 👑🐝

WOW! I just have to take a moment to share how grateful I am right now. Being able to travel with Rachel (and Aaron) to Scotland for RARE Edinburgh and be right back in the assistant element of a book convention like when I first met Rachel was such a surreal experience. Add playing tourist and being our goofy a$$ selves in another country was such a highlight for me! I mean come on, castles, catacombs and red telephone booths?! Yes please!

ps. Those red doors were A LOT heavier than I thought they would be! Oh and, pretty sure I brought the sunshine there - grateful for not needing half of what I packed or having to fix my hair due to "rainy Scotland" LOL. 😂

Meeting readers in person, and hearing their stories of how much Rachel’s books have influenced their lives, brought and back their love for reading was so cool. The gifts were hilarious and beyond thoughtful and I thought it was really really cool when a few of you even asked to have me in your photos too! I was taken aback a little, NGL. I love how much you’ve all welcomed me into the Rachel world and I can’t wait for more adventures to come.

Getting to meet Annette Marie and her team, and literally making a new bestie with her PA was SO much fun! Us PA's gotta stick together and Francine is an absolute delight! I'm already looking forward to our next convention together.

Also, knowing that while we were abroad all the orders were being handled with the utmost care was just icing on the cake and I couldn’t be more thankful for our new fulfillment coordinator, Dani! Thanks for holding down the fort while we were gone babe! You’re truly amazing and we appreciate having you on the team more than you know!

That’s all I have for now so thank you for having me!

XoXoX